Nobody told you it will be easy, said one of my friends. I wish they would have… Well, at least – easIER.
A couple of days ago I received a shocking message from a close and dear friend of mine. I felt like I became broken into thousands of pieces and have to find a way to lift them up and put the pieces back together again. It’s not easy. But I am determined to manage it.
Life, relationships or even a business is never just upwards and onwards. It’s a rollercoaster. It’s like an Italian serpentine – up and down, right and left, fast and slow. But great things actually happen when you are down. You suddenly notice, who are your true friends and supporters. Who are the people whom you can rely on or who are ready to even act silly to brighten up your day or mood.
I was searching for answers and ways to deal with smashingly hard times, to find something to be grateful for in this tough period of life. Even in the hardest days you can find something to be grateful for, they say. And – when you search, you discover. I discovered the life story of Mariska Hargitay, the actress that is known in UK currently as a leading figure in one of a detective serials (I can’t deny – I watch mostly detective serials, if any).
She has said: “Life is hard, but you just don’t quit. Don’t let fear get the best of you. It only holds you back from possibilities and greatness. You’ve got to kick fear to the side, because the payoff is huge. I don’t focus on what I can’t control. If I can’t control it, let’s move on. I think that we have all been swallowed up in ‘shoulda-woulda-coulda’. You figure it out and you walk tall and go through it. Some days it’s chicken, and some days it’s feathers.”
A couple of weeks ago somebody said to me: “Its easy for you – you have a good life, you do not understand struggles”. Well… let me tell you… Everyone has struggles. Some harder, some lighter, some longer, some shorter, but everyone has their hard days at times. There are no exceptions. NONE. I struggle too. Massively sometimes. Especially the last 18 months of my life have been particularly personally and totally hard. Impossible sometimes. Hopeless at times. But the most important thing is – what is your take from the hardship times, how do you find the ways to pick yourself up and pull yourself together again? And consider this, what are you learning from these very tough days. There is always something to learn. And there is always something to be grateful for in your life.
Currently, my Top 5 in hard times are:
- Search for and find ways to pull yourself together again (It’s hard, I know, but it’s worth it!)
- Watch out for people who have got your back, there is always someone whom you can trust
- Don’t focus on what you can’t control, if you can’t control it – move on
- Share your journey and learning with others, there is always someone whom you can inspire and help
- Be aware that: “Some days it’s chicken, and some days it’s feathers.” It just is like that. Period.
And after the hard times have passed away – see if there is any adventurous opportunity from that. You’ve got to turn hardships into learning and opportunities, there is always a way! As Kristina Kuzmic says in one of her latest videos: “You can pick up the destroyed pieces of your life and still create something beautiful out of them”.
No matter how hopeless things might seem at times, just don’t give up. There is always a way!